Should i stay married to my gay husband

Still, the increasing visibility of queer people being honest about who they are is a powerful force for good. I know he refused to separate, but the fact is that you can and probably should initiate a divorce unilaterally. You have so much life ahead of you. Come out to your family and your friends and accept no attempt to shame you for the truth of who you are.

I grew up in an incredibly conservative and religious household, and being a lesbian was just about the worst thing in the world you could be. I have no plans of cheating. I feel so alone and like I cannot talk to any other queer people about my situation or even identify as a member of the LGBTQ community.

Many straight women married to gay men consciously choose to do so with their eyes wide open. However, you entered into this arrangement with your husband under the assumption that attraction and romantic love would develop over time. Not to mention, it feels awesome to proclaim your truth without apology.

If I could call myself a lesbian, and basically remain celibate but married, I would. Marriage requires the commitment of both partners. You either have to make up your mind to stay with your husband—giving up any hope you might have of being romantically or sexually satisfied—or you have to break up and weather the emotional, legal, and financial turmoil of divorce.

Will this always feel so bad? Resign yourself to the heartache of losing your husband as a friend—maybe for a little while, maybe forever. I think the right answer is to leave him. The staying married route feels like a cop out. Wherever you are in your own process, enjoy!

Needless to say, it took a really long time for me to actually come out to myself, much less anyone else. So leave. —Not-Quite-Lavender Marriage. Will I always be seen as selfish? My husband knows this. I have had two relationships in my entire life. I suspect there is.

I fit every single stereotype my parents had of lesbians, and I think it freaked them out, so they advocated against it even harder. I think your husband quite clearly considers himself gay, which is far more relevant to your marriage than my. If you choose to come out today or any other day , know that I adore you, admire your bravery, and think your hair looks so great like that.

This summer, I asked my husband to separate and he said no. Happy National Coming Out Day, everyone! He was hurt and angry and it crushed me. His family knows this. The first was with a woman and the second was my husband, whom I met when I was I waited and waited, but I just thought this is how things are supposed to be.

Here’s the twist: Even if I had proof he was gay—and even if that proof were sexual infidelity with men—I’d happily stay married to him. There are plenty of wives who choose to stay married even after finding out later in the. I think the right answer is to leave him.

You either have to make up your mind to stay with your husband—giving up any hope you might have of being romantically or sexually satisfied—or you have to break up and weather the emotional, legal, and financial turmoil of divorce. It also feels disrespectful to my husband to openly call myself a lesbian.

Would you consider him bisexual or gay? My husband is a real catch, and we really enjoy. I have complicated feelings about this day.