Foreveralone gay

They just want me to be happy. When cancer stole her a few years later, I was left with two young children to raise. What if I died and no one ever knew the real me? With all this inspiration, I was ready. By spring , my youngest was graduating from high school, and I was approaching the empty nest.

The many months of pandemic lockdowns allowed me the perspective to reevaluate my past and steer my future. I'm a middle-aged man who has been married twice and widowed. Some of my friends think I'm gay and have told me that they think I'll be happier if I just liked girls. Like at this point, I wish I liked girls lol.

Blatant homophobia and pressure to fit in left me thinking I was some sort of freak. I worried they'd think our marriage had been a sham. I realized if I died too young, like my first wife, I'd leave this planet never having lived my life as I was meant to.

I entered the gay dating world in my 50s, expecting it to be very different from what I found. I avoided getting close to anyone and buried my secret, in favor of a more "normal" experience. r/LGBTForeverAlone: A place for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, etc people to unite with our one thing in common feeling forever alone.

Finding other gay men becomes an exhausting chore with the bars and online filled with the same select few, many of whom are already in relationships, on drugs, or just wanting casual sex. Everyone I told was so happy for me and so understanding and accepting. I'm also a father to two grown children.

I told my kids, my parents and family, and my friends. I knew as early as 12 or 13 that I was different, but in those days, I had no frame of reference for what it meant to be gay. So with a terrifying leap, I decided to come out — first to myself, then to others, cautiously.

And I'm gay. I eventually met and married a wonderful woman who knew my secret, and we started a family together. During that long journey of grief and single parenthood , I had a few more relationships with women; I even married again, briefly. I eventually met my partner, and my coming out has been liberating.

When I told my children — who were 22 and 18 at the time — they were basically like, "Oh, OK. What's for dinner? My sexuality was a burden I carried for so long, and hiding it became part of my core identity, weighing me down. But I finally had the courage to come out at Honestly, I sometimes wish I hadn't waited so long.

Growing up in the '80s in Las Vegas , I was in a different, difficult time. I asked my gay friends to share their stories, and they were brave and generous with their advice. People (family, peers, etc.) thought I was gay since I was at least In fact, I think my own mother started the rumor because she was embarassed about how much of a loser I was.

My parents have definitely thought I've been gay. During all those years, I knew what I was and what I really wanted, but I kept the secret and never acted on it. I was especially nervous about telling my late wife's family. It turns out that all my worry was in vain. The pandemic was the catalyst for my decision to come out at 55 to my children, who supported me.

I did my research by watching everything I could find on the queer experience, coming out, and gay romance.